July 24, 2011

Movie Review: Captain America

I wasn't sure what to expect with Captain America because superhero movies are usually hit and miss with me (usually miss). Of all the big super movies that have come out recently (Thor, X-Men, and Green Lantern) this is the only one I have actually seen. Mostly because I am tired of Natalie Portman, I don't understand X-Men and Green Lantern looked stupid.


 So here comes Captain America. I braved a theater full of dads with their junior high aged sons and one guy who was very excited for the new Thundercats show reboot (not that I blame him). Captain America was the prize.  Like most first movies in a superhero franchise, we are introduced to the main character and his alter ego...more importantly HOW he becomes his alter ego.

FINALLY I was getting tired of watching Cartoon Network
only for Batman reruns and Ben 10. Do me proud.

Steve Rogers is just your average guy (HAHAHAHAHAHA as if. He has the body of a prepubescent. It's very distracting and sadly hilarious) who really wants to serve his nation and achieve BAMF status. Unfourtanetly for him, he not only has the body of a 12 year old boy but ALSO the health of a 12 year old dog...if that makes sense. So, no Army for him...until a german scientist sees that he has "heart"and if the movies have taught us anything, "heart" goes a long way


Naturally, he wants to use him for his little experiment...then BAM! Steve Rogers is now a stud. Too bad some jerk-wad nazi has to ruin all the fun and kill the scientist. So now they can't use the experiment to create an army of studs (at least that's what I think was the plan). According to Tommy Lee Jones, Steve is now a pointless experiment who should remain in the lab...but some other guy thinks he could serve his country in a much better way...by becoming CAPTAIN AMERICA!

No, not some kickass guy who leads sweet missions (that's later!)...more like the leader of a chorus line. Anyways, Captain America becomes somehwhat of a star to the America public, but once he goes to Europe things aren't exactly peachy...and that's where shit starts going down. Oh, and the villian is a familar face (at least until he peels it off).

"I had to get my revenge on those cruel kids somehow"

So...is Captain America worthy of other great superhero movies?

Just for this? Uh...yeah.

 I enjoyed it the whole way through...it kept me engaged, unlike other Marvel superhero movies...

"Hey dad."
Woah. I did nazi that one coming

I thought the casting was good...especially Tommy Lee Jones. He saved the movie from being decent to better than decent. The action scenes were spot on, totally badass with slow mo and sweet, sweet music. The whole movie worked despite my total confusion of the Nazis massive technology and also, the fact that an asian guy and a black guy were in a team with a bunch of white guys...because if there is one thing 1940's America hated, it's asians and blacks. I'M JUST SAYING. Historical innacuracies aside (because who cares in a movie like this), there were a few scenes where the movie got really, really good. I was very optimistic that this would be a great movie. It never came through fully though, so I can't exactly say that it was spectacular. It was awesome and badass, totally worth the ticket price (that I didn't pay for)...and totally worth seeing, but don't expect the Dark Knight. Not that any of us were. Captain America is hopefully a sign of even better things to come.

Probably the thing that bothered me most was the romantic interest. Yeah, she was cool...she punched that douche in the face and has a better shot with a pistol than Jack Bauer, all while wearing perfectly applied red lipstick.

See what I mean?

 However, she was an unwanted distraction. Call me old fashioned, but I just wanted to see more shooting and use of that AWESOME sheild. Steve Rogers is not a ladies man like Tony Stark and Bruce Wayne, so I'm not expecting him to get a ton of tail throughout the movie...especially since he thinks fonduing is a metaphor for sex. God damn. The overused lame "oh no you might die, kiss me because we might not have another chance"  scene ALMOST ruined the entire movie for me if not for Tommy Lee Jone's comedic timing. I love him.

"Yeah well...get in line "


All in all, Captain America is worth it. It has some cool scenes and even though it's corny (and dumb) to the point of laughter at times, you will probably still enjoy it. Like Steve Rogers, it has heart. Of course, then I must assume you're not a heartless bastard yourself.


"Who, me?"


Also, a nice tip: Wait through the credits. They take awhile, but if you're patient you will see something hopefully to your liking...if you enjoyed the movie that is. I left the theater saying "Fuck,yeah". The good people at Marvel had a master plan all along...they are truly geniuses.

Final Grade: B


Coming Soon:

At Harry Potter I saw a trailer for Rise of the Planet of the Apes. That trailer didn't strike my fancy since it was amongst others that were much better, however the trailer this time around improved and I may just see it...if only for James Franco.

And of course, there was a trailer for the new Spiderman movie next summer. I always had some reservations with the previous three, probably because Tobey Maguire is like 40 and I dislike Kirsten Dunst...a lot. The only reason I tolerate them is for the same reason I will be seeing Rise of the Planet of the Apes. This reboot however looks promising. I got the tinglies during the climbing walls/webbing around NYC scene...it was like a video game! So cool. I can already tell it is going to be more like the comic books because of the lovely Emma Stone as Gwen Stacy. The new spidey also looks more legit...probably because he isn't 40. As a extrememly soft core Spiderman and Batman fan(as in I know more than the average bear but I don't read them too often) I am very pleased with the direction the new franchise is going.

You keep me young

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